Soul Divers life coaching Welcome, Winston-Salem, North Carolina » Read: Ashley’s Blog

Embrace Your Inner Wild

A.G.J. — Thu, 02 Feb 2012 01:37:16 +0000

Africa is an extraordinary place to visit and Londolozi is the best place to experience a South African Safari. My good friends at the Good Work Foundation have started a fundraiser by raffling off a free two night stay complete with game drives, beautiful accommodations and amazing food.
GWF is one of my favorite foundations. They are building schools, educating people in rural South Africa and creating community with its people.
If you have ever thought about going to Africa, this is a once in a life time opportunity to stay in one of the most beautiful places and help out along the way.
Please consider a donation and enter the raffle through the link below. Good Luck . . . or as they say in Africa, Hold Thumbs!

Bon Africa,
Ashley

http://blog.londolozi.com/2012/02/the-good-work-foundation-raffle/

Prayer for Sage

A.G.J. — Wed, 11 Jan 2012 16:55:07 +0000

This past Christmas a friend’s new born son developed a serious brain condition which required emergency surgery. During my visit, I was moved by his wonderful spirit to write a prayer for him. I wanted to share it.

PRAYER FOR SAGE

O great spirit, divine radiant one,
We welcome Sage with endless gratitude
And give thanks for his abundant gifts.

MAY HIS EYES SEE ALWAYS BEAUTY
(sunrise over distant seas, flowers budding spring)
MAY HIS EARS HEAR EVERY SONG
(chirping birds, everything)
MAY HIS HANDS BE EVER MERCIFUL
(touching, healing, warm)
MAY HIS LEGS BE EVER STRONG
(walking through any storm)

MAY HIS HEART STAY GLADLY OPEN
(free, to love it all)
MAY HIS FEET DANCE WILD RED EARTH
(joyfully having a ball)
MAY HIS BELLY LAUGH LIKE BUDDHA
(giggling under stars)
MAY HIS SOUL KNOW ONLY SURF
(journeying near and far)

Amen.

see change

A.G.J. — Sat, 10 Sep 2011 10:00:08 +0000

Walking with our dog, Callie, today, I was thinking about how we can respond to people and situations in one of two ways: reactively or creatively. Those are the options. You can be reactive or creative. In the moment of “sitting” with those two words, I realized they are anagrams. Move the “c” in reactive to the front and you’ll have the word “creative”. How cool. Change the “c” (i.e. change what you’re seeing in that moment) and you’ll shift from reacting to creating.

high five forever

A.G.J. — Mon, 05 Sep 2011 09:35:16 +0000

A friend taught me recently that if you look at the other person’s elbow when you high-five, you’ll never miss. They’re absolutely right. How cool is that. Focus on something other than the desired result and you’ll get the thing you most want. So here’s the question: What’s the “high-five” you’re currently seeking? What is it that you most want to experience? Now instead of focusing on that shift your attention off the result and over to a part of the process. Remember the old chestnut Happiness is like a butterfly. If you chase it, it will elude you, but if you turn your attention to other things, it comes and sits quietly on your shoulder.

don’t forget this

A.G.J. — Thu, 01 Sep 2011 00:13:31 +0000

Last month in South Africa, my family and I visited with some elephants at a rescue. We got to touch, feed, ride, and learn about them. Early on the trainer introduced an elephant named Medwa to seven of the guests. As the trainer told Medwa each guest’s first name, Medwa extended his trunk and took in that person’s scent.

Ninety minutes later, having returned from our wonderful ride (and not to digress but it must be shared that an elephant’s heart beats approximately 22 times per minute, while ours is more like 70 beats. As a result, riding an elephant is, in my experience, deeply soothing. Everything slows down. One friend describes elephants as “the Om walking”.) Anyway, when we returned from the ride, the trainer asked the seven people who’d met Medwa to please come and form a horizontal line. Then he brought Medwa over and placed a baseball cap in the dirt. He pulled out his list of seven names and instructed the elephant, Medwa, give the hat to Anna. Medwa curled his trunk around the cap and gently extended it to Anna. Then the trainer asked, Medwa, give the hat to Richard. And he did. Each time, no mistakes, Medwa gave the hat to whomever he was asked. I was blown away and realized – with absolute certainty – that a much cooler story than the one most of us are currently telling about animals wants to be told.

The trainer asked my son, Gates, how many commands our dog knew. She’s working on 3, Gates shared. The trainer asked how many Gates thought Medwa had learned. Shrugging and squinting, Gates says, I don’t know. 14? 15? The trainer shakes his head no. 80.

tragedy in norway

A.G.J. — Tue, 09 Aug 2011 01:38:23 +0000

Much will be written about the tragedy in Norway. Some will say the gunman was crazy. Others will reveal how calculating he was. Many will lament the day a country’s heart was broken (once again) witnessing the massacre of her children. At the heart of this story flesh and blood heroes continue to emerge. Men and women who could’ve stayed a safe distance away from the chaotic nightmare instead sped straight into it, saving many, many lives in the process.

One story in particular caught my attention.

A survivor shared on NPR how he’d watched one of the teenage girls who’d been shot, look at her friends, and tell them, “You are so beautiful. I can tell by your faces that I’m going to die, and you are so beautiful.” Apparently the young girl just kept murmuring those words. The man never saw her again. He doesn’t know if she lived or died.

All I know is that the child uttering those words radiated presence and fearlessness. No bullet can harm that light. Not now, not ever. Of that, I’m sure.

mad about you

A.G.J. — Wed, 13 Jul 2011 09:35:58 +0000

What to do when you are angry with those you love most?

This question was asked of me recently. Here’s how I answer:

Most important is becoming aware that my anger is the direct result of the thoughts I am believing, in that moment. My loved one isn’t making me angry. My thoughts about my loved one are.

It may sound like a subtle difference, but it’s huge. When we believe a loved one is the result of our anger, we need them to change. When we’re aware it’s our thoughts, we can question those thoughts and allow change. The work of Byron Katie is the simplest, deepest, most incisive tool I’ve encountered for not only dealing with anger, but returning (again and again) to the peace within. (For more information about this work, go to: thework.com )

A disciple was once told by his guru, when you are angry don’t see the other person, see your anger. We all have justified reasons for being angry. Our rage feels realistic, obvious even, given the situation, but what I sit with more and more is how I truly feel when I am angry – noticing the tension in my jaw/shoulders/neck, observing the shake in my hands and voice, experiencing the shallowness of my breath and how the flow of energy in my being is blocked. Even my teeth hurt. Then I ask is this who I really am? Who else could I be? Do I have a choice?

Michael Douglas was on Oprah this past year. She asked him about the anger he used to use to fuel his characters and if he still did. No, he explained, Anger is a false sense of energy. He’s so right. Anger can seduce us into feeling alive, empowered, but the deeper truth is it takes us out of our true nature (love). Unleashing anger hurts others and ourselves. We believe we don’t have a choice, but it’s the belief in our anger not our loved one’s behavior that creates the inevitable torrent. As Byron Katie explains, when I believe the thought “I am angry”, it has be acted out. I believe it. It’s my religion, the altar where I pray.

Another wonderful teacher, Marianne Williamson, explains that in those times of anger, as we become aware of the change inside us, we can always ask for help. So now I will literally pray to God to take the anger from me. I surrender everything to him/her/the universe, placing myself upon the altar so that I may be altered. (Those words taught to me by Marianne Williamson.)

Bottom line: Getting mad happens, but awareness and the willingness to take responsibility for the anger, not to blame others, returns us to the love that we are. It keeps our hearts open to forgiveness and understanding. It allows us to grow. In short, stopping the madness really can restore our sanity. That’s something to be glad about. Thank you, friend, for asking.

holy hook-up

A.G.J. — Tue, 05 Jul 2011 02:18:41 +0000

Near the end of her farewell season, Oprah did a final show of “Harpo Hook-Ups”. (Examples of her famous hook-ups include Justin Timberlake making a wedding video for a fan, Cher inviting one of her biggest fans and his boyfriend to Vegas for a concert, and gifting one of Oprah’s ultimate viewers – who wasn’t eligible for her Favorite Things show because he was only 17 – a few of her favorite things including a brand new, cherry red VW bug.)

One of the hook-ups resulted from a letter Oprah received from James Hill, who wanted her to “hook up” his best friend, Ron Brown, a huge sports fan. Apparently Ron’s dream was to be a reporter on SportsCenter. First Oprah arranged for Ron to interview Chicago Bulls MVP Derrick Rose, outside the locker room after a big game, and then arranged for him to report on SportsCenter the next day.

Here’s what really caught my attention….

When Oprah asked James Hill what it was like to see his best friend, a Walgreens employee on SportsCenter, James responded,

“Seeing his dream come true is a dream come true for me.”

In that revelatory moment, I realized that that really is what it’s all about it. We’re all connected. When our best friend’s dream comes true so does one of ours. Let’s be sure we’re celebrating that. When something wonderful happens to someone you know, don’t go to that jealous, frustrated, what-about-me place. Embrace them – literally or figuratively – and give the universe a big, cosmic high five.

We get so down on the world. We talk about how crazy it is. We proffer tons of evidence: wars, poverty, pollution, crime, the economy etc… and still the sun rises, our children laugh, rain falls, the moon shines, songs are sung, waves are surfed, hugs are received. Let’s not miss the dreams that do come true, every day.

We ought to talk about our dreams more. Let’s focus on what can inspire not defeat us. Ask a friend to share 3 of their dreams with you. Write them down. Hold that space where you both can feel the dream as a reality. Revel in it. Then, if you really want to experience grace, ask the universe how you can help make your friends dream come true. The guidance will be given. It always is. Follow it you, dream-maker, you. Hook it up.

on my side now

A.G.J. — Wed, 29 Jun 2011 02:31:14 +0000

Let’s let go of time as a linear construct. It isn’t. On some level deep within, we already know this. Time moves in circles, waves, it freezes, races, skips, and repeats. The child not yet born holds time in her unthinkably small fingers. Time is a friend, a warrior, a poet, a loner, a myth, a dream, a vivid hallucination of an eternally drunk man – all these things and none of them at all. Therein lies our freedom. Time is whatever we believe it to be, nothing more. Nothing less.

Who is Time in your life? Take a moment to know and understand that you have the power to continue that relationship or change it. For many years, time bedeviled me. Now I embrace that coyote trickster, that strange teacher, that miraculous gift. Without time, there’s no story. Love the story, love time. Welcome home.

the love and hope you have been waiting for

A.G.J. — Wed, 22 Jun 2011 03:35:12 +0000

A reader wrote in . . .

Something led me here – I have lost the will to go on. I feel lost and terribly depressed and I feel like I need to be in a facility but don’t have the money. Your story made me cry – I have been waiting for someone to speak words of love and hope to me. I would like to remain anonymous. Thank you for your time.

Thank you for writing. Your words touch me deeply. The “something” that led you here is also the love and hope you have been waiting for. It may not make any sense, given how lost and depressed you are feeling, but all that you seek is already within you. What blocks you from experiencing that truth are the thoughts you are believing. That’s how powerful you are. And what’s confusing is that these thoughts, fueled by the power of our belief in them, don’t feel like thoughts. We think they’re the truth (not just an opinion). We think they are reality, but they’re not.

For more on this, please check out the work of Byron Katie. www.thework.com

It is the cleanest, clearest, and most powerful tool I’ve found to help me respond to thoughts that bring pain, fear, and stress.

My heart is with you.